On second thought…

Jn 6:19 When they had rowed about three or four miles, they saw Jesus walking on the sea and coming near the boat, and they began to be afraid. [1]

A lot happens in this verse, rowing, walking, coming, and being afraid.

Rowing….Lord, I often feel that I am rowing across a stormy sea and You are not there…everything, even nature is against me. Even if I am with others, we are alone against the elements. We’ve been in this situation before, we don’t flinch, we charge on, oblivious of our peril…we’ve gotten so use to our world and its sin, we don’t even register that we are part of it. We aren’t even afraid at this point, we’re at home on this sea of life…we aren’t afraid until we see You appearing miraculously on our horizon. You introduce an element we try to forget, we try to ignore, we try to live as if it doesn’t exist…You represent a scary aspect of reality with which we don’t want to cope, because we can’t cope, we can’t control it, we can’t even schedule it, it just happens, it is, and there is nothing that we can do about it. Wish we could, wish we could just amortize it over the course of a couple of centuries, taking death/eternity/Truth/ Reality/God/Jesus/Judgment in little chunks might not be so bad…I could ignore them under the illusion that I would live forever right here on earth, right in my “cozy little home” living my “cozy little life,” oblivious of the horror, the carnage, the destruction, the avarice, the lust for domination, power, control which, bestial with its seven heads and ten horns [Rev 13:1], ravages the world. Unfortunately, both death/eternity/Truth/Reality/God/ Jesus/Judgment and the ten horned monster exist in our temporal time zone, evolve in our ever ticking world. Why do You invade my serenity, my “security,” my “comfort zone,” and shake me up, shake me to my very boot-straps, my very soul. I was so complacently blazé about the world, my neighbor, my soul until You came traipsing across the waters of my world, holding up Truth in all its gory glory, bloody brilliance, ravaged radiance. I don’t care to see that, thank You very much! Why can’t You just “walk on by” [Mk 6:48] and we’ll survive somehow.

On second thought….

[1] Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. and are used by permission of the copyright owner. All Rights Reserved. No part of the New American Bible may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the copyright owner.


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