Cramping my style!

Jn 6:21 They wanted to take him into the boat, but the boat immediately arrived at the shore to which they were heading. [1]

God, I’m right there with the Apostles,…You’re here, let’s get You into the boat, then we’ll continue on to shore. You are here, this is what I plan to do, You’ll come with me. An instance of making You laugh by telling You my plans.

Getting use to having You call all the shots is not only difficult but aggravating, frustrating, irritating. It cramps my style.

I guess that’s the point…I am fixated on “my style,” not Your will. Not really seeking first the Kingdom of God and letting the rest of the chips fall where You want them, not where I “would prefer” them. [Mt 6:33]

Now, if I really take this verse into account, it would seem that following Your will, i.e. that the boat immediately arrives at the shore where we are headed, is a lot easier than having to row all the rest of the way, about three or four more miles.

I tend to be very stubborn,…my way or the highway. I don’t really care if my way takes three times as long and is exhausting, I wanta do it my way. Indeed, in perspective, I remind myself of a stubborn, spoiled little child, stamping my foot and throwing a tantrum. Silliness!

Help me, Lord, to truly do Your will here on earth as it is in heaven, [Mt 6:10] not just mouth the words. They become so rote, so routine, so backgroundish, that I pay little or no attention to them as I babble on like the pagans You warned me about. [Mt 6:7].

I am sorry…that really doesn’t cut it, but it’s all I have right now. I can promise to do better, to pay attention to what I am saying, but without Your help, based on my past experience, that won’t do a hill of beans.

When it comes down to it, this whole thing is faith, because for human beings this is impossible, but for God all things are possible. [Mt 19:26] Faith in prayer, faith in living, faith in action, faith that what I do in the normal course of my daily life is what You have placed before me as Your will and that, in doing it for You and not for myself, not as a way to gain the attention or compliments of others, not as a way to manipulate others, not as my will, I offer You what You want, obedience to Your will. Amen. Alleluia!!!

[1] Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. and are used by permission of the copyright owner. All Rights Reserved. No part of the New American Bible may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

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