My grace is sufficient for you.

Why is this so difficult. Perhaps it is because I can’t see for forest for the trees…because I think I am a tree, in fact, the tree, around which the forest grows….  Perhaps because the delusion I know is more familiar, more comfortable, more “me,” at least as I think of myself to be, than the reality that I don’t know, don’t wish to know, wish to forget, wish to disinherit, wish to reject outright…but find that I can’t do that because it is me, the real me, the literally little, truly old me, the me that I work so hard to avoid, to overcome, to gloss over, to pretend I don’t know him, to laugh off, to kill off…but painfully I know in my heart of hearts that this is the “I am” of me, the real me that God gave me at my conception, the real me that was born, was baptized, the real me that I have been trying to hid in the closet ever since.

Perhaps we all have to come out of the closet, not the closet of sexual identity, though perhaps that may be part of it, but the closet of sin, of rejection, of attempted suicide of the real me by the false me…every day in every way, trying to run farther and farther from “it”, from me, but, to my horror and ever growing fatigue, is not only running along side me, but I find it is me…running.

Is there a difference between real sin and the delusion of sin in falling short of my imagined false image…All delusion, all falsehood, all lies, whether verbal or actual, i.e. lived out in act, is sin…it is rejection of the Truth, it is rejection of God’s goodness, it is rejection of God’s love, it is rejection of the gifts that God has given me from the moment of my conception until now, it is me clinging to the illusion of my mind rather that the reality of my cross.  For my cross is no more nor less than my life, not as I think I am, not as I want it to be, not as I imagine it is or should be, but my life as God graces me with here and now, with no soft lights, no make-up, no cameras, no fancy clothes, just life.

Mary, His Mother states that through the cross, God is being glorified in every person.  The miracle that God created is that by accepting God into my life, by allowing Him to determine what I do, what I say, what I think, who I am, I not only give Him the greatest glory, because I am not rejecting any of his glorious gifts which manifest Him to the world…but I also, though His divine providence, am carrying my life, my cross. I am not only coming ever closer to my greatest happiness, but I am living at this moment, in this place, with these people in this happening my greatest truth, my greatest reality, my greatest happiness.

Do not be afraid to carry it, Paul, my grace is sufficient for you….the more I can live His life, His love, His Truth, His Goodness, and the more I can shed, can die to the self I think I am, I wanta be, I imagine myself to be, I slave to be, I have sold my soul to be [though fortunately God has bought it back, has demanded it back, for it was obtained under duress, under false pretenses, illicitly, immorally, imprudently, pridefully, sinfully]…the more I can reject Satan and all his works and all his illusions…the more I can just be who God made me, the more I praise God, I reverence God, I serve God, I love God…and the more I love and serve everybody…since we are all in the same boat, the same ark, the same Body, the same creation, since we are all the same,… period.

My Son is with you and he will help you. Let us find, through the steps to Calvary; the roadway of our own true lives.

Help us throw off the picture of Dorian Grey that we carry around with us…this was the picture that Zachariah had of himself and his wife which he couldn’t let go of when Gabriel told him it was false and God had another reality for him, a reality of parenthood.

Help us adopt the reality of Mary that processed the words of Gabriel and, when confronted with a mystery, asked humbly what new reality was going to be given her by God.  She, too, was told, my grace is sufficient for you.

The Conclusions of Unbelief

If for this life only we have hoped in Christ, we are the most pitiable people of all. [1Cor 15:19][1]  This, to me, is the saddest verse in the entire Bible.  And the most devastating. 

If Christ has not been raised,

• then empty [too] is our preaching;
• empty, too, your faith.
• Then we are also false witnesses to God, because we testified against God that he raised Christ, whom he did not raise if in fact the dead are not raised.
• Then those who have fallen asleep in Christ have perished.
• your faith is vain;
• you are still in your sins. [1Cor 15:14-18]

All that is terribly logical.  And we are left with only logical conclusions, the most prevalent of which is “Eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow you die.” [Is 22:13; Eccl 8:15; Lk 12:19]

The thing that always bothered me about this passage is that Paul turns it around and argues, not from the starting point of Christ, but from the starting point of the dead: If there is no resurrection of the dead, then neither has Christ been raised. [1Cor 15:13,16]  Note that he repeats himself, so his word order is not by accident.

If there is no resurrection of the dead, there would have been no reason for Christ to be raised. There would have been no reason for Him to suffer and die.  Indeed, there would have ultimately been no reason for Him to be incarnated, to become man.  It might have been better if He had just remained in heaven as the Son of God.  There He lives eternally.  No fuss, no muss, no involvement, no contact, no regrets, no love.

But look around. This is a creation that shouts: “I love you!”  This is a Creator who brings us flowers, who lavishes upon us all sorts of food, who nurtures us and comforts us with warm sunshine, cool breezes, lapping waves and twinkling stars.  This is a Creator who trusts us with the most dangerous, most exciting, best gifts ever: our minds, that we might know Him, and our free wills, that we might choose to love Him.

This is a God, we are told, from the first moment of our creation, loved and cared for us, giving us all creation for which to care and paradise within which to live.  He gave us the Tree of Life to sustain us.  He walked with us in the cool of the evening in the Garden.  All He asked is that we not eat of the fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil.

Even when we disobeyed, He dealt justly but mercifully with us, not condemning us to eternal death or punishment but having us work out our punishment over the course of our lives, giving us another chance to respond to His love.  Even Cain, though he kills his brother, he allows to live.

And so it was down the ages.  Saving Noah and his family and making a covenant with them.  Calling Abraham, granting him a son, testing him and rewarding his faith with a promise to his family would become God’s people.  Sending Joseph into slavery that he might save Egypt and his own family and father.  Hearing his people’s cry and raising up Moses to lead them from slavery to freedom and their own new land.  Caring for his people with mighty Judges, with Saul, David and his royal line, with prophets who called the people back from sin and idoltry.

Then, in the fullness of time, God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through him.[Jn 3:16-17] Jesus had eternal life.  God has eternal life.  It is not for Himself nor His only Son that God sent Jesus into this world to pitch His tent among us…but that we who know Him, who love Him, who follow Him might not be dead forever, but might have eternal life.

God loves the world so much that, far from condemning it, He infused His own Son, Life itself, creation Personified, into the world to save it through Him.

How often does Love have to tell us: Why do you look for the living among the dead? We are the living, even though we die.  Death is but a door to a different and eternal Life.  Resurrection was not for Jesus alone…He is but the first, the proof of God’s love, the guarantee that we have much to which to look forward, a foreverness with the One who loves us more than we love ourselves.

Our daily problems and worries can wrap us up in ourselves, in sadness and bitterness … and that is where death is. That is not the place to look for the One who is alive! [Pope Francis I, Easter Homily, 2014]

But now Christ has been raised from the dead, the first fruits of those who have fallen asleep. For since death came through a human being, the resurrection of the dead came also through a human being. For just as in Adam all die, so too in Christ shall all be brought to life, but each one in proper order: Christ the first fruits; then, at his coming, those who belong to Christ; then comes the end, when he hands over the kingdom to his God and Father, when he has destroyed every sovereignty and every authority and power.[1 Cor 15: 20-24]

[1] Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. and are used by permission of the copyright owner. All Rights Reserved. No part of the New American Bible may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

The Glory of the Father

While we focus on Jesus on this Easter Sunday, it is to the glory of the Father that Jesus is risen; Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who in his great mercy gave us a new birth to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead. [1Pet 1:3] God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through him. [Jn 3:16-17]

Jesus himself said: If I glorify myself, my glory is worth nothing; but it is my Father who glorifies me. [Jn 8:54]  Paul reminds us that every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.[Phil 2:11]

The Father’s Plan of Salvation. [Eph 1:3-14]

The Silent Sabbath

He descended into Hell.

Once I said, “In the noontime of life I must depart! To the gates of the nether world I shall be consigned for the rest of my years.”  I said, “I shall see the Lord no more in the land of the living. No longer shall I behold my fellow men among those who dwell in the world.”  My dwelling, like a shepherd’s tent, is struck down and borne away from me; you have folded up my life, like a weaver who severs the last thread.  Day and night you give me over to torment; I cry out until the dawn. Like a lion he breaks all my bones; day and night you give me over to torment.  Like a swallow I utter shrill cries; I moan like a dove. My eyes grow weak, gazing heaven-ward: O Lord, I am in straits; be my surety!  You have preserved my life from the pit of destruction, when you cast behind your back all my sins.[1]

This is the day when our Savior broke through the gates of death. He has destroyed the barricades of hell, overthrown the sovereignty of the devil.[2]

The earth trembled and is still because God has fallen asleep in the flesh and he has raised up all who have slept ever since the world began. God has died in the flesh and hell trembles with fear. He has gone to search for our first parent, as for a lost sheep. Greatly desiring to visit those who live in darkness and in the shadow of death, he has gone to free from sorrow the captives Adam and Eve, he who is both God and the son of Eve. The Lord approached them bearing the cross, the weapon that had won him the victory. At the sight of him Adam, the first man he had created, struck his breast in terror and cried out to everyone: “My Lord be with you all.” Christ answered him: “And with your spirit.” He took him by the hand and raised him up, saying: “Awake, O sleeper, and rise from the dead, and Christ will give you light.”[3]

He will place the sheep on his right and the goats on his left. Then the king will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father. Inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world. For I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, a stranger and you welcomed me, naked and you clothed me, ill and you cared for me, in prison and you visited me.’ Then the righteous will answer him and say, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you drink? When did we see you a stranger and welcome you, or naked and clothe you? When did we see you ill or in prison, and visit you?’ And the king will say to them in reply, ‘Amen, I say to you, whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me.’ Then he will say to those on his left, ‘Depart from me, you accursed, into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels. For I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me no drink, a stranger and you gave me no welcome, naked and you gave me no clothing, ill and in prison, and you did not care for me.’ Then they will answer and say, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or ill or in prison, and not minister to your needs?’ He will answer them, ‘Amen, I say to you, what you did not do for one of these least ones, you did not do for me.’ And these will go off to eternal punishment,…

But the righteous to eternal life.”[Mt 25: 33-46]Adam, Eve, Abel, Noah, Abraham, Sarah, Lot, Melchisedech, Isaac, Joseph, Moses, Miriam, the Judges, David, the Prophets, Joseph, John the Baptist, Dismas…what a procession of righteous. Sinners all, but repentant saints as well. “Amen, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.”

It was never about Him.  It is always about us.  It is always about the Father.  God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through him. Whoever believes in him will not be condemned, but whoever does not believe has already been condemned, because he has not believed in the name of the only Son of God. [Jn 3: 16-18]

Christ, the new Adam, you entered the kingdom of death to release all the just since the beginning of the world, may all who lie dead in sin hear your voice and rise to life.[4]

[1]From Morning Prayer for Holy Saturday. Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. and are used by permission of the copyright owner. All Rights Reserved. No part of the New American Bible may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

[2] From the Office of the Readings for Holy Saturday, From the Responsory

[3] From 2nd Reading of Office of the Readings for Holy Saturday, From an ancient homily on Holy Saturday

[4] From Morning Prayer for Holy Saturday

Carried

• Today is Holy Thursday.
• Today’s station: Jesus is laid in the tomb.
• Today’s liturgy, Jesus institutes the Eucharist.

How often in our Churches is this Eucharist, Jesus himself, again laid in a tomb.  We call it “the TABERNACLE.” Originally according to the Hebrew Bible, the Tabernacle (Hebrew: מִשְׁכַּן‎, mishkan, “residence” or “dwelling place”), was the portable dwelling place for the divine. It went where the people went, it took “on the “smell of the sheep” and the sheep are willing to hear” God’s voice.  He dwelt with them, He was in their midst, He protected them, He heard their cries, brought them out of slavery, fed them manna and gave them water in the desert.  He was their God and they were His people.  This is what a tabernacle should be…God with us.

And then, the Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us [Jn 1:14],[1] not just in a tent but as a man; Jesus the Nazorean was a man commended to you by God with mighty deeds, wonders, and signs, which God worked through him in your midst, as you yourselves know. [Acts 2:22].  Again, God with us.

Today, 2000 years ago, this Jesus gave himself, his body and blood as our food and drink, this Eucharist, this true food from heaven,whoever comes to me will never hunger, and whoever believes in me will never thirst.[Jn 6:35]

Jesus did not mince words: I AM the bread of life. Your ancestors ate the manna in the desert, but they died; this is the bread that comes down from heaven so that one may eat it and not die. [Jn 6:48-50]

He said it is the sine qua non: “Amen, amen, I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you do not have life within you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him on the last day. For my flesh is true food, and my blood is true drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me and I in him. Just as the living Father sent me and I have life because of the Father, so also the one who feeds on me will have life because of me. [Jn 6:53-57] Unless I wash you, you will have no part of me. [Jn 13:8] The blood of…Jesus cleanses us from all sin. [1Jn 1:7]

This Eucharist, this Body and Blood, this true food and drink, is suppose to be “the source and summit of the Christian life,”[2] sending us out to make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. [Mt 28:19-20] and bringing us and all these disciples back to celebrate the heavenly banquet of the new covenant in my blood, which will be shed for you. [Lk 22:20]

What do we have instead…Our TABERNACLE is now the fixed, locked box in which, in some Christian churches, the Eucharist is “reserved” (stored).  That first Holy Thursday, after the first Eucharist, Jesus did not say: “Let’s stay right here and the Sanhedrin will calm down and we will keep this keep this covenant all to ourselves.”  NO. Jesus, knowing everything that was going to happen to him, went out…[Jn 18:4] Get up, let us go. Look, my betrayer is at hand. [Mt 26:46]

Pope Francis I likens this other tomb to our Churches:

“The biggest threat of all [to missionary zeal] gradually takes shape: ‘the gray pragmatism of the daily life of the Church, in which all appears to proceed normally, while in reality faith is wearing down and degenerating into small-mindedness’. A tomb psychology thus develops and slowly transforms Christians into mummies in a museum. Disillusioned with reality, with the Church and with themselves, they experience a constant temptation to cling to a faint melancholy, lacking in hope, which seizes the heart like “the most precious of the devil’s potions”. Called to radiate light and communicate life, in the end they are caught up in things that generate only darkness and inner weariness, and slowly consume all zeal for the apostolate.[3]Some resist giving themselves over completely to mission and thus end up in a state of paralysis and acedia. [4]

Let us not allow ourselves to be robbed of the joy of evangelization![5] The joy of the Eucharist!  The joy of Easter!  Today Christ bursts forth from the tomb of the Eucharist, the bread of Life.  On Easter, Christ bursts forth from the tomb of Death.

Let us not be caught in the tomb of mummies. Let us, the dead [come] out, tied hand and foot with burial bands, and [our faces] wrapped in a cloth. [Jn 11:44] Let us hear Jesus say to each of us: “Untie him and let him go.” [Jn 11:44]

Let us, with Pope Francis, say: [6]

• Yes to the challenge of a missionary spirituality
• No to selfishness and spiritual sloth
• No to a sterile pessimism
• No to spiritual worldliness
• No to warring among ourselves
• Yes to the new relationships brought by Christ

Let us meet the challenges Francis cites in today’s world, saying: [7]

• No to an economy of exclusion
• No to the new idolatry of money
• No to a financial system which rules rather than serves
• No to the inequality which spawns violence

Let us not carry the body of Jesus to the Tomb. Let us not carry the body of Jesus to the Altar of Repose in our Churches.  Let us carry our Cross with this Jesus to Calvary.  Then, on Easter, we will be ready to carry the Resurrected Jesus, the New Covenant Jesus, the Eucharistic/Thanksgiving Jesus “into the whole world and proclaim the gospel to every creature.” [Mk 16:15]

[1] Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. and are used by permission of the copyright owner. All Rights Reserved. No part of the New American Bible may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

[2] Catechism of the Catholic Church, 1324; Lumen Gentium, 11.

[3] “The Joy of the Gospel,” 83.

[4] “The Joy of the Gospel,” 81.

[5] “The Joy of the Gospel,” 83.

[6] “The Joy of the Gospel,” 78-101.

[7] “The Joy of the Gospel,” 53-60.

Cleaved

One soldier thrust his lance into his side, and immediately blood and water flowed out. An eyewitness has testified, and his testimony is true; he knows that he is speaking the truth, so that you also may [come to] believe. [Jn 19:34-35] [1]

You really died.  If people thought You were faking it and were just comatose there on the cross to be revived later by Your disciples, this thrust should settle the argument.  For blood and water to flow out, presumably the heart must have been pierced.  And You, Yourself, confirmed You had been pierced when, the Sunday after Easter, You appeared again to Your disciples and called Thomas to You and said: “ Bring your hand and put it into my side, and do not be unbelieving, but believe. [Jn 20:27]  Little did that soldier know that his thrust would underpin the very faith of Your faithful down through the ages. We know that all things work for good for those who love God, who are called according to his purpose. [Rom 8:28]

Cleave 1: “to sever or split” You cut Yourself off.  Mark and Matthew say You gave a loud cry and then breathed You last. [Mk 15:37; Mt 27:50] Cut off from Your Mother, Your Apostles, Your followers, even Your enemies.

Cleave 2: “to adhere firmly and closely or loyally and unwaveringly” Luke puts the 31st Psalm in Your mouth: “Into your hands I commend my spirit; you will redeem me, LORD, God of truth.” [Ps 31:6, Lk 23:46] commending Your Spirit to the hands of Your Father in faith and trust the Your Father, the Lord, the God of Truth, will redeem You who were born and came into the world “to testify to the truth.” [Jn 18:37]

Both: John has You seem to consume the 4th cup of the Passover: When Jesus had taken the wine, he said, “It is finished.” And bowing his head, he handed over the spirit.[Jn 19:30]  For John, You are a conquering hero, orchestrating Your life to the end.  Scott Hahn points out “There’s no mistaking the fact that St. John, the beloved disciple, understood our Lord’s sacrifice as the culmination, the fulfillment of the Old Testament Passover. Here is the true priest, as well as the true victim.”  Here You offer all that He has to the Father.

It is amazing to me how all these pieces fit together: our Father, the God of Truth, You, the testifier to the Truth, and the Holy Spirit whose Psalm not only foretells this relationship, but testifies to its outcome, redemption…not only for You, but for all of us in, with and through You.

“Woman, behold your Son.” [Jn 19:26] Finally, moments before You had said this to Mary of John.  Now it echoes in her mind as she beholds You, laid gently in her arms, her baby boy once more.  You had wiped his sweaty, dirty, brow before in Nazareth when he had finished a day’s labor.  But now that brow was lifeless, pierced, bloody from the thorns.  There is no sorrow like Your sorrow. He has joined “the boys in Bethlehem and its vicinity two years old and under….” and you, Rachael: “Then was fulfilled what had been said through Jeremiah the prophet: “A voice was heard in Ramah, sobbing and loud lamentation; Rachel weeping for her children, and she would not be consoled, since they were no more.” [Mt 2: 16-18]

You beckon me to listen: “Son, behold your Mother.”[Jn 19:27]

• A part of Mary died with me, yes, but she will rise and become the Mother of the Church. 
• But look to my people: Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how many times I yearned to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her young under her wings, but you were unwilling! [Mt 23:37]  The Gospels mention two times I wept, once at Lazarus’ tomb and once for this city: As he drew near, he saw the city and wept over it, saying, “If this day you only knew what makes for peace—but now it is hidden from your eyes.…They will smash you to the ground and your children within you, and they will not leave one stone upon another within you because you did not recognize the time of your visitation. [Lk 19: 41-42,44]…

It has begun: And behold, the veil of the sanctuary was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth quaked, rocks were split, tombs were opened, and the bodies of many saints who had fallen asleep were raised. And coming forth from their tombs after his resurrection, they entered the holy city and appeared to many. The centurion and the men with him who were keeping watch over Jesus feared greatly when they saw the earthquake and all that was happening, and they said, “Truly, this was the Son of God!”[Mt 27:51-54]

[1] Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. and are used by permission of the copyright owner. All Rights Reserved. No part of the New American Bible may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Commended

“Father, forgive them for they know not what they do.” [Lk 23:34][1]

Of all Your sayings, I find this the most comforting of all. You indeed became human…You experienced this baffling conundrum of human weakness that Paul describes so accurately: What I do, I do not understand. For I do not do what I want, but I do what I hate.…For I know that good does not dwell in me, that is, in my flesh. The willing is ready at hand, but doing the good is not. For I do not do the good I want, but I do the evil I do not want. Now if [I] do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells in me...For I take delight in the law of God, in my inner self, but I see in my members another principle at war with the law of my mind, taking me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members [Rom 7: 15,18-20, 22-23]

Not that you sinned but that You took the “sin that dwells in me…[this other] principle at war with the law of my mind taking me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members” into Your very self and overcame it. “For human beings this is impossible, but for God all things are possible.” [Mt 19:26]

Thus, the culpability is not in the temptation but in refusing Your help in overcoming the temptation.  It is my lack of faith, my lack of trust, my trust in myself and not in You that brings me to the brink of sin.  With Paul, I cry: Miserable one that I am! Who will deliver me from this mortal body?[Rom 7:24]  Only You, Lord, only you.

When I bring you my humiliation of being myself as I truly am, with my unfaithful ego-centric temperament, temptations, limitations, failures, to You, You really understand. It is easier to give you these since they are more me and more on the surface than any “successes” I might have had and with great hubris, attributed them to myself, my doing, my talents, my ingenuity.  Indeed, these attributions, too, seen in the light of  Truth, are my temperament, limitations, and failures, for any chance that I could have offered them to you for Your glory is canceled by my seeking my reward here.  Jesus, You are very, very clear about this…it is one of the few times You repeat Yourself three times: Amen, I say to you, they have received their reward. [Mt 5:2,5,16]

So it is with success: Is he grateful to that servant because he did what was commanded? So should it be with you. When you have done all you have been commanded, say, ‘We are unprofitable servants; we have done what we were obliged to do.’” [Lk 17:9-10]

So what You commanded is very simple: Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. [1 Thes. 5: 16-18]  And You, God, are very, very merciful.  If we do what our Father has commanded in secret, You, Jesus, again add your triple emphasis: Your Father who sees in secret will repay you. [Mt 5: 4, 6, 18]

Therefore, I offer to you my failures, and humbly beg Your forgiveness.

[1] Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. and are used by permission of the copyright owner. All Rights Reserved. No part of the New American Bible may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Crucified

Crucified

Get Your hand over here.  Hold still.  I know…Your back stings from scourgin’ and strippin’.  Look it, the sooner I get the nails in, the sooner You’re hung up; the sooner You’re up, the sooner You’re out of Your misery.  So hold still!  Wish You weren’t so bloody.  Makes it harder to get the nails in straight.

Ok, I got this one started.  There, it’ll hold.  Tie his arm to the crossbar. Hold this hand down; his nerves are spasming.   Ok, I’m in.  Sure, it goes in the palm.  If they’re tied, it goes in the palm. You don’t tie him, it in the wrists…holds the weight better.  Gets very messy if it rips and he falls off; we have to start over.

Alright, who has the inscription.  What’s the guy done?

Oh, Ho. So this is the famous Jesus….From Nazareth, you kiddin’ me. Can anything good come from Nazareth? [Jn 1: 46].  Now that’s a laugh: King of the Jews. Pilate has a sense of humor.

Looks like the big-wigs aren’t too happy with Your inscription.  Tough!  What he wrote, he wrote, that’s my feeling. [See Jn 19:22]

They say You’re a miracle worker.  Well, You’ll need a miracle to get out of this one.

Hey, don’t let that lady near by…this ain’t anything for a lady to see.  His mother!  Oh, crap! This is not something a mother should witness.

Woman, I really don’t think you should stick around.  Once they hoist him unto the post, I’ve got to nail his feet.  Soon he’ll start choking and gasping for air, there’ll be screaming they can’t breath, even the bravest begs for death in the end.  You run along. From the shape Your Son is in, it should only be a couple of hours.  Then you come back and claim the body.

You with her?…convince her to go.  It ain’t gonna be nice.

Alright,  Hoist him up.  Come on, you lubbards!  It’s only one man! Get him up there. He’s tied on tight, just drop it in the hole.

Good.  Ok, bend his knees and hold his feet.  Right over left…seems to work better.  Need a large spike here.  All you have to do is get it in there…the downward pressure keeps it from popping out.

You need help on the other two.  I’ll do the feet here; you finish up over there.

Ok, that should do it.  They’re all yours.  Seems like you have more spectators for the King’s death than our usual lot.  Can you believe this weather?  Black as night, almost and it’s just past noon.   Hey, I warned the King’s mother to clear out; it was not going to be a scene she wanted to witness…but she wouldn’t budge.  Keep track of her.  That mob’s riled up; no telling what they’ll do. Your men may have more to do than just shoot craps.

Think I’ll stick around and see what happens.  It’s not every day I get to crucify a King.

 

Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. and are used by permission of the copyright owner. All Rights Reserved. No part of the New American Bible may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Covered

When the soldiers had crucified Jesus, they took his clothes and divided them into four shares, a share for each soldier. They also took his tunic, but the tunic was seamless, woven in one piece from the top down. So they said to one another, “Let’s not tear it, but cast lots for it to see whose it will be,” in order that the passage of scripture might be fulfilled [that says]: “They divided my garments among them, and for my vesture they cast lots.” This is what the soldiers did. [Jn 19: 23-24] [1]

 Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made loincloths for themselves. When they heard the sound of the LORD God walking about in the garden at the breezy time of the day, the man and his wife hid themselves from the LORD God among the trees of the garden. The LORD God then called to the man and asked him: Where are you? He answered, “I heard you in the garden; but I was afraid, because I was naked, so I hid.” Then God asked: Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree of which I had forbidden you to eat? [Gen. 3:7-11]

Jesus had nothing to hide.  I, like Adam and Eve, have everything to hide but can’t.

As they came forth from their mother’s womb, so again shall they return, naked as they came, having nothing from their toil to bring with them. This too is a grievous evil, that they go just as they came. What then does it profit them to toil for the wind? [Eccl 5:14-15]

What profit is there for one to gain the whole world and forfeit his life? For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and that of the gospel will save it. [Mk 8: 36,35]

“Naked I came forth from my mother’s womb, and naked shall I go back there. [Job 1:21]

The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD!” [Job 1:22]

Jesus has nothing.  I have much.  Yet Jesus has everything; I have nothing.

For we brought nothing into the world, just as we shall not be able to take anything out of it..For the love of money is the root of all evils. [1 Tim 6:6, 10]

“If you wish to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to [the] poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” [Mt 19:20-21] Sell your belongings and give alms. Provide money bags for yourselves that do not wear out, an inexhaustible treasure in heaven that no thief can reach nor moth destroy. For where your treasure is, there also will your heart be. [Lk 12: 33-34]

As they were proceeding on their journey someone said to him, “I will follow you wherever you go.”  Jesus answered him, “Foxes have dens and birds of the sky have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to rest his head.” And to another he said, “Follow me.” But he replied, “[Lord,] let me go first and bury my father.” But he answered him, “Let the dead bury their dead.^* But you, go and proclaim the kingdom of God.” And another said, “I will follow you, Lord, but first let me say farewell to my family at home.” [To him] Jesus said, “No one who sets a hand to the plow and looks to what was left behind is fit for the kingdom of God.” [Lk 9:57-62]  Everyone who has given up houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or lands for the sake of my name will receive a hundred times more, and will inherit eternal life.” [Mt 19:29]

When the disciples heard this, they were greatly astonished and said, “Who then can be saved?” [Mt 19: 24] You make it very difficult, God. Jesus looked at them and said, “For human beings this is impossible, but for God all things are possible.” [Mt 19:25] Whoever remains in me and I in him will bear much fruit, because without me you can do nothing. [Jn 15:5]

You have set us impossible goals, but You will make them possible.  Without You, I can do nothing good.  Help me always to remain with You.  Remain always with me.  Strip me of my clingies, my must-haves, my sine-qua-non’s.  Help me to practice Ignatian “active indifference” …to become utterly free to respond to Your call, Lord…Call me to be free enough to either keep it or get rid of it, shift my attention entirely to what You want, and not what I want.  Help me know what You desire and help me desire only that which serves Your Divine Majesty more. [2]

[1]Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. and are used by permission of the copyright owner. All Rights Reserved. No part of the New American Bible may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

[2] See Ignatius’ Three Classes of Men. http://www.magisspirituality.org/spex_reflection/the-three-classes/

Crushed

Then he led him to Jerusalem, made him stand on the parapet of the temple, and said to him, “If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down from here, for it is written: ‘He will command his angels concerning you, to guard you,’ and: ‘With their hands they will support you, lest you dash your foot against a stone.’” Jesus said to him in reply, “It also says, ‘You shall not put the Lord, your God, to the test.’” When the devil had finished every temptation, he departed from him for a time. [Lk 4: 9-13] [1]

I want my temple!  Not God’s temple, my temple!  The one where I imagine I am honored, worshipped, adored.  I had it as an only child!  Now I want it again!!!

I use to be trapped in the “I am better than they are” fantasy world where I am the center of attention, the nexus around which all life revolves. Still am at times. But I’d loose my identity when I often dash my foot against the stone of truth, the Corner Stone, reality, others, the Son of God.

God, when I do that, I am afraid, nobody will pay any attention to me, nobody will love me…Silly, I have loved you even before you were born; I “so loved the world that..[I] gave…[my] only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life. For…[I] did not send…[my] Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world might be saved through him.[Jn 3:16-17] This is my commandment: love one another as I love you. No one has greater love than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. [Jn 15:12-14]

It’s very disconcerting that the devil gets to temp You, Jesus. You are God, after all. You are his maker, You are what holds him in existence and gives him everything…but You humbled Yourself to allow Yourself to be tempted by him for our sake?  Not a wise move in my estimation…my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways [Is 55:8] For…[you] do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with…[your] weaknesses, but one who has similarly been tested [tempted] in every way, yet without sin. [Heb 4:15]

It’s also scary that the devil can quote scripture so easily. Indeed, beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but underneath are ravenous wolves. By their fruits you will know them. [Mt 7:15-16]  Each time You countered with Scripture, You knew exactly how to parry his thrust.  I, however, am just a mere human, without Your knowledge, without Your holiness, without Your stamina, without Your grace.  How can You expect me to dodge his bullets as adroitly as You did?

Do not worry about how or what your defense will be or about what you are to say. For the holy Spirit will teach you at that moment what you should say. [Lk 12: 11-12] Do you not recall that each time I confronted a person possessed, the devil recognized Me: They prostrate themselves before Me, crying out in a loud voice, “What have you to do with me, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? I adjure you by God, do not torment me!”[Mk 5: 6-7]

Be cautious, however; never underestimate the evil one: he flies under the radar, enticing you to think he really does not exist, is a figment of your imagination, could not be a creature that the good God allows to exist, has little to do with the real world. Be very cautious or you will find yourself confronted with a power beyond your comprehension. He will taunt you: Jesus I recognize, Paul I know, but who are you? [Acts 19:15] and like the seven sons of Sceva, he will spring upon you and subdue you and you will be forced to flee “naked and wounded from that house.” [Acts 19:16]  That is why I have you pray: do not subject us to the final test, but deliver us from the evil one. [Mt 6:13]

My angels, indeed, guard you…but be sober and vigilant. Your opponent the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion looking for [someone] to devour. [1 Pet 5:8]

Listen to what I told Paul…“My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.”  Imitate him: I will rather boast most gladly of my weaknesses, in order that the power of Christ may dwell with me. Therefore, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and constraints, for the sake of Christ; for when I am weak, then I am strong. [2 Cor 12:9-10]. You shall not put the Lord, your God, to the test. In my weakness, I fell, but in God’s strength, I got up and continued on.

[1]Scripture texts in this work are taken from the New American Bible, revised edition © 2010, 1991, 1986, 1970 Confraternity of Christian Doctrine, Washington, D.C. and are used by permission of the copyright owner. All Rights Reserved. No part of the New American Bible may be reproduced in any form without permission in writing from the copyright owner.